Saturday, August 09, 2008

In Loving Memory


Seven years ago from today my Daddy lost his struggle with Cancer.When I was a teenager Daddy had a tumor in his thigh and it was cancerous.He got cobalt treatments for it back then and now they have found out years later..that the cobalt treatments caused cancer.He was having some problems with his legs and had an operation for spinal stenosis. As far as I understand ..that is a tightening of the casing around your spine.He didn't recover well and moved from Florida ..back to Georgia and went to another Doctor and this Doctor discovered that he had a tumor behind his bladder that was the size of three grapefruits.During the time of his trying to find out what options etc. that he had, they discovered that the tumor had wrapped itself around his hip and spine.He took radiation treatments for it but the cancer was just too big.The only other option they gave him was to have his left leg removed at the hip and have to wear a colonoscopy(mispelled I am sure) bag to collect his bowels. He opted to go to heaven and get a new body.:) It was an agonizing year for all of the family and especially for my Mom and I who were his main caregivers. It's no fun to watch a loved one suffer the way he did and not much at all you can do but try to make them comfortable. Mom did soo well.When the Hospice nurses came to check on him ..they were amazed that he didn't have one single bed sore.Mom made sure of that.:) She and Daddy were both nurses aids and worked for the V.A. for years. Mom worked on the Cancer ward so she knew what to do and what to expect while he was sick. She says it helped her a lot.I didn't know that much about it and I think I am glad I didn't cause I don't think I could have handled knowing what he was gonna have to go through.KWIM? It was hard enough on a day to day basis.:(
The day Daddy went to be with Jesus...Mom and my brothers and I were at his bedside and I was soo sleepy I couldn't stand it.It had been a long week of us being called to his bedside over and over with Mom thinking he was gonna go any minute.We stayed up all night around his bedside and then I was sitting on a chair at the end of his bed and had ahold of his foot...just to let him know I was there.I fell asleep and Mom sent me to the office to grab a few minutes of sleep and not ten minutes later they came into the room and told me he was gone. I sometimes wonder if he waited for me to leave.:) Anyway..I didn't cry when I saw him laying there so peacefully.I looked up to heaven and shouted.."Daddy..You made it!!!" and I laughed.You see..I KNOW there is a God and I KNOW my Jesus is real and I KNOW my Daddy is with him.:) Yes..I cried later..when I knew I would miss him and even now I am trying to write this through the tears...because I love him and want to see him again.He brought a lot of joy and laughter into our lives...and the family is not the same without him...but the scriptures say..'Oh death where is your sting?" It's a lot easier when you are confident that they aren't gone..they are just somewhere else waiting for you.:) This reaction may seem odd to you..but he was no longer in pain and agony and I was thrilled for him.:)

The Lord gave me this poem about a week or so before. I think it was his way of preparing me for it. Click on the preview and you will be able to read it if you want.:)

I wanted to share this song with you..it was his favorite.:)

4 comments:

justrenae said...

Oh Valinda, I cried with you. I know that you miss him and I admire your positive attitude. I have never lost anyone that close to me, I still have both of my grandparents. They are getting up there in age and I can't imagine a world without them in it. They practically raised me. Both of my grandmothers brothers have passed (one this year) and it kills me to see the pain in her eyes.

She (even as a child and teenage years) has always been my best friend and the most beautiful person I have experienced in my life.

Your beautiful poem lifted me but also made me cry.

You will be in my thoughts all day today.

With love and hugs, Renae

Anonymous said...

Thanks hun, that really was a good write up. I read it to your sister as she was going to work today.She said,"Aw that is so sweet" That also was a good picture you chose to put out for all to see. Yes, we all miss him very much, but we have so many good memories, and that helps with the sad side of him being gone. I'm looking forward to seeing him , with family and friends, throughout eternity, But best of all, we will see Jesus. Love you, Mama

Shelley Hendrix said...

I love you and I love this post. I sure do miss Grampa--there was simply no one else like him.
The greatest compliment anyone can receive is to be told they remind people of Jesus--the second to that is when Grandma said Stephen reminds her of Grampa. I can hardly believe he has been with Jesus for 7 years already. He is still so much of us!

xxoo,
Shell

J9 said...

Your post really touched me. It's been 13 years since my mom crossed, and you are right when you wrote "but he was no longer in pain and agony and I was thrilled for him" When you know that their trip 'home' will be glorious, and they won't BE in any pain any longer, and they are lovingly welcomed home, it's actually a happy occasion for THEM. My mom had Alzheimer's, and I took care of her at my home for 3 years. The night she died, I patted her hand and said you GO! As in 'you go girl' not in a bad way, because I was happy that she finally got her wish to go 'home'. She took care of her own mother for 6 years, but that was with 3 little boys and a farm and grandma was in bed! She was also proud that her mother never develped a sore one. Anyway, your post just touched a nerve for me, but in a good way, and I just wanted to say that there are others out here that have been there, and are thinking of you. Faith in Jesus Christ really does pull us through during these times.
Your post was a nice tribute to your father.